27 Dec 2013, 1:39pm
Writing
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(a) moral dimension

“the diacritic is an animal”

(i)
palimpsest is a throat in the frog.
it’s the very next day & I’m sad.
I loved the tranny, I loved her more
but she wasn’t mine and now she’s gone.
no one is anyone’s
that’s what the dreams lately have been teaching me.
“you” don’t belong to you even.
only no one has an owner.
there is a thing I want to do before I stop moving
before I own the car
before I try Nutella, before cornflakes
before I watch Luke Skywalker on endless reruns
on SyFy on my cablebox.
do you know what that thing is?

(ii)
no brain. shut up.
I want to teach my throat to bark
like a dog lost in the rain.
Toto. Tin-tin. Tin-tern.
is that the hope?
is that what I am talking about?
I won’t wipe the mirror with the doily
or I’ll spoil my hands.
spitshine shoe-polish.
hart crane, dizzy gillespie.
so much for standing up on a bridge because
there is a whole world looking at you now.
faker. pointless math exercise. irredeemable.
like you might jump like you might.

(iii)
there is the dog.
I will take the moustache to porn city
and swap it for poodles.
we’ll have a good use for them.
we’ll go nuts.
we’ll go walking with them and pretty soon
we’ll be disgusted like they are.
we’ll adopt their language, manners, customs, etc.
our whole way of talking and dressing
and communicating.
I haven’t the doggiest. I haven’t got time for this.
well, shit.
then we’ll have walked all the way to the jetty.
the jetty is where I will get my change,
you know what I mean.
I won’t “go” to the other side

…Rose of Sharon the little girl who holds up three fingers
…the doorway

(iv)
space invaders, jeopardy, cough syrup,
pointless math exercises.
taking the car to car city to meet all the other cars.
getting your car’s oil changed
by someone who doesn’t know you.
being a civilian.
being learningdoing nothing doing nothing.
to hell with bootstraps, emerson, thoreau melville
early art all american ars poetica.
I don’t know about these days what people think / what?
I don’t want to work on anything. to do work. to work at.
to just look at you working!
when people ask me what I am doing for a living
I should just tell them,
I am checking these ropes for loose ends.
(this car has no spark plug wires—how does it run?)

(v)
the dog it tied to me like a pole.
I know that’s probably a wig
but you look good in it / as a girl.
will I see you again?
is that your name upstairs, on the fireplace?

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